It started with a bet. A bet about baseball. I can’t recall any specific conversation I ever had with the man except this one. He happened to be talking to my dad about one of his favorite baseball movies – Major League. I mentioned how I liked it too. And flippantly, I said that it’s a rated R movie.
Ben (my father’s friend) was shocked and quite confident that I was wrong and the movie wasn’t rated R. He mentioned how he’d never let his son see a rated R movie and so I must be mistaken. I assured Ben that it was, in fact, rated R. I was ten years old and Ben must have been in his forties.
Ben was convinced I was wrong and he bet me $20 that he was right. Never in my young life had the financial stakes been this high. But I was certain and so I bet on myself, shook his hand and said, “Deal! 20 bucks!”
Now, this was way before the internet age where a simple Google search would have settled the score in seconds. We left the beach that day and a couple months went by and I totally forgot about the whole situation until an envelope with my name on it arrived in the mail.
Children don’t get mail so I was intrigued. I opened the envelope and my eyes widened as I clutched the prettiest twenty dollar bill I had ever seen. Wrapped around it was a short note from Ben: “You were right and I was wrong. Stop watching R rated movies.”
I didn’t realize then just how impactful of a leadership lesson that would play for me later on. As is often the case, experience doesn’t make you better, only reflection on experience does.
And when I reflect back, I realize what Ben did is so sadly missing in the culture of today. He kept his word and admitted when he was wrong. People impact us through conversation and by observation. Think right now to all the bosses you have worked for and reflect on how many of them you observed showed the strength to say: You were right. I was wrong.
The wild thing is, as children we get in trouble for telling a lie, but adults get in trouble for telling the truth, and often get rewarded for lying. I was stunned when I first started working jobs as an adult and how many of the “leaders” would say one thing and do another or never follow through on promises or ever admit they were wrong. Their word was worth less than that $20 bill. And to my dismay, as I got older, I was saddened by how frequently “leaders” in government and business did not tell the truth and how the masses tolerated it and rewarded them for it.
The truth about leadership is there is no leadership without the truth. Too many of us have merely experienced manipulation that’s erroneously labeled as leadership. Lies always lead to demise, not always that of the liar, but the people they mislead. If you don’t follow the words you say, then the words you say won’t be followed. And if no one is following you, you might be the “boss” but you aren’t a good leader.
What we all want and what we all deserve from those in positions of power is to tell the truth and admit when they’re wrong. Too many people in power “big league” their employees, meaning they mistreat them and take advantage of them. In reality, these ego-driven power craving goons will always be minor league leaders at best. What we really need are more Major League Leaders, where they speak the truth and the R rating represents responsibility.
Ben could have never looked up the rating of the movie and or could have chosen to never mail me the money, as I was just a kid and we only saw each other once a year at the beach. He could have made the excuse that he “forgot” if I brought it up, but being a leader means: I’m responsible! To move up from the minors to the majors, you must tell the truth, do the right thing, right away, repeatedly, and take responsibility when you’re wrong, and you’ll do right by those you lead.
To whom do you need to mail “$20” today and admit you were wrong? What promise do you need to remember that you forgot? How can you eliminate ego and elevate Love? When you put principles before profits and your word is one of truth, follow-through, and responsibility, people will trust you to lead them to a better place and to be a better person. And there is nothing more major than that.
Welcome to our journey together to the Major League of Leadership. Your music is being played and you’ve been summoned to the mound…and people are watching and learning by how you play the game. Relentless truth will save the day.
